Give me a break, but don't break me.

i hate myself for doing something i should not do. i hate doing things i don't like to. i hate being in this position. i feel numb. i need a break. i need to avoid a break from expectations a break from pleasing so many people a break of being pressured a break of being pushed. it is undeniably hard being a woman. u have so many rights to fulfill. we can't please EVERYONE. but does ANYONE care to understand us? but somehow I think I deserved it. maybe it serves me right. maybe it is just me thinking to much. I think I just need that break. God, please help me persevere. give me faith that I will not always be in this position. send me Your 'angels'. send me the love. send me those guidance You used to send me because now I think I need it the most. I stop a while to think about it. Because when I think about it I wanna quit. and don't let me quit. I am not a loser to quit. How I wish time is running faster, so I can pass this. But with time running out, will I be ready? You don't need to understand this.